I have pretended to be a good girl… even though I actually love mischief and pushing boundaries and ignoring stupid rules.

I have pretended to be domestically inclined… when really, I don’t care at all about nicely cooked dinners, clean floors or neat houses.

I have pretended to be happy… when I was dying and crying inside.

I have pretended to be sad… because I yearned for someone’s attention.

I have pretended to be friendly… when she bored me to tears and I couldn’t wait to escape her company.

I have pretended to be neutral and unaffected… while inside, I burned with anger at their arrogance, racism, sexism and pig-headed politics.

I have pretended to be a Christian… when, for the most part, I couldn’t see any similarities between this revolutionary called Jesus and the stuff and man-made rituals that had been invented in his name.

I have pretended to be polite… whilst inwardly hating everything they stand for.

I have pretended to be confident… whilst everything inside me yearned to escape into the shadows and hide.

I have pretended to be caring… when I didn’t care at all.

I have pretended that I didn’t care… when my heart was breaking.

I have pretended that I wanted to change the world… when actually… I wanted to change myself.